Villains Do Date Villains! Page 5

I blinked. Okay then. At least there was someone trapped in here who had a little bit of spirit. Someone who I could maybe chat with. It would be better than all these women shrinking away from me, that was for damn sure.

  "Where are you?" I asked.

  "Up here you bitch,” the voice said. "I don't care if you kill me. I don't care if you do the same thing you did to those assholes. They might've had it coming, but I'd rather die than live in this world you created!”

  I floated up towards that voice. I was confused and annoyed. After all, I was trying to save these women. And what the hell was she talking about when she mentioned the world I'd created?

  I finally drew even with a cage that held a pretty dark haired girl with striking blue eyes. Eyes that were the color of ice. Eyes that stared daggers at me.

  "Fuck you," she said.

  "What did I do to you?" I asked.

  She threw her head back and laughed. Then leaned forward. Flipped me the bird and spit at me. Which was better than flinging her slop bucket at me, but only just.

  Bunch of ungrateful bitches.

  I wiped the spit off of me. Looked down at the tattered ragged remnants of what had been my second set of green clothing from the campus bookstore. Yeah, I was definitely going to have to go on another shopping expedition. I really wished I knew what the hell had happened to my suit. When I found the asshole that stole it…

  "You know what?" I said. "I don't have to take this abuse from you."

  I tossed the key. The girl's eyes went wide as she seemed to realize that maybe she’d finally pushed me to far. She tried to grab the thing, and I heard it hit her cage floor with a metallic ting.

  "If you can reach that key then maybe you can get out of here. Otherwise maybe I'll send someone down here when I get done saving the city."

  "Yeah, that's really fucking likely. Save the city by destroying it?" the girl called out.

  I spun around mid air. Glared at her. And I saw that she had the key.

  Damn it.

  I was surprised at how annoyed I was that she had the key. After the treatment I'd gotten from these women there was a part of me that almost wanted them to be stuck down here. A part of me that terrified me more than any of the other strange villainous impulses that’d been hitting me since I woke up.

  What the hell was wrong with me that I was slightly disappointed that a bunch of innocent women who'd done nothing wrong other than being in the wrong place at the wrong time in a city that had gone to hell weren’t going to rot in their cages?

  That wasn't me. That wasn't what I was all about, and yet the thought had been there, and it’d been a satisfying thought.

  "You might think this makes us even Fialux," the girl said. "But we’re not anywhere close to being even. Not after what you did. You took my whole family from me!"

  "That's not me," I said.

  She laughed and flipped me the bird again. Though this time she was far enough away that there wasn't a chance she was going to be able to spit on me, at least.

  Thank goodness for small mercies, I suppose.

  I floated up, and then got so angry that I plowed through the ceiling. Maybe some rubble would fall down through there and land on those women, but I didn't care.

  That not caring scared me more than anything else. More than those women hating me. More than everyone acting like I was some sort of monster.

  What the hell had happened to Starlight City? What the hell had those girls thinking I was responsible?

  I burst through into the light. The sun had come up while I was down there killing traffickers. I shot up higher. Higher.

  I floated above the city. Flying saucers floated off in the distance. It looked like a first rate invasion, and I wasn't sure what to make of it.

  Then I saw something that did make some sense in this world gone mad. Something that brought a smile to my face.

  Someone rose up out of the cityscape below firing on one of those flying saucers in the distance. Whatever that small figure was firing blasted straight through the shielding on the thing and sent a massive bolt of light through the top.

  More figures flew up from below to land on the saucer and swarm over the thing. Some of the little dots that’d been floating over the city firing down suddenly turned in the direction of that brewing fight.

  I grinned. I couldn’t quite make out what was happening on the other side of the city, but I did have a pretty good feeling that if there was someone out there fighting these aliens then Natalie had to be nearby.

  And if Natalie was over there fighting this invasion then damn it, I needed to help her! So I shot off in that direction, ready to finally do something in a world that made a little more sense than it had moments ago.

  8

  Reunited and it Feels So Bad

  I moved in closer. The things swarming over the flying saucer resolved into people I recognized, and not in a good way.

  They were villains! Sure they were mostly the low level kinds of villains that had been regularly moving in and out of SuperMax back before I got into the heroic game, but they were still villains I recognized from SCNN.

  Sure I’d sort of made peace with the fact that Natalie was a villain. Like the biggest and greatest villain this world had ever seen, thank you very much, but it was still a little weird to see her working with these people. She usually worked alone.

  Which I figured was yet another sign that there was something seriously wrong in Starlight City these days.

  Also I totally got thrown for a loop as I flew in towards them. One moment I was flying, and the next I had the strangest vision of me hanging out in some arena looking down on villains moving in on Natalie.

  The vision was gone just as quick as it came. I couldn’t even remember what’d just happened, other than I knew there was something really fucking weird going on here.

  What the fuck was wrong with me that I kept having those fainting spells? What brought them on?

  Whatever. There was a fight going down, and I needed to help Natalie take care of business. She was hovering just above the alien flying saucer firing on some armored aliens who were stepping out of ports on the thing and firing on her.

  I grinned. If I knew my Natalie then there wasn’t a chance she was going to let any of those bastards get in a shot. She had to be working on something that would get these alien assholes out of the city for good!

  I flew down as one came up behind her. I had time to see two women standing beside Natalie, one of them using technology that seemed pretty close to the stuff Natalie used and the other slamming her fists into aliens with enough force that it was knocking the armor clean off of them, but I was more worried about the alien group sneaking up behind them that they hadn’t noticed.

  Those fuckers were going to pay if they thought they were going to hurt my girl, damn it!

  A lot of things happened at once. I was flying in and getting ready to save the day, but then Natalie turned at the last moment and brought her wrist blaster to bear on the aliens. Only she stopped and stared as she also saw me moving in.

  I must’ve been a sight. Covered in blood wearing the tattered remnants of some clothes from a local college bookstore that had no business going into combat like this because they weren’t indestructible like the last set of clothes I’d had. I was a mess, not at all how I imagined reuniting with my girlfriend, but it had to be done.

  Then she pulled the trigger. What the fuck? She’d seen me swooping in, she looked surprised to see me, and she pulled the trigger even though I was between her and those aliens!

  I slammed into some of the aliens who’d been sneaking up behind her at the same time as that blast from her wrist blaster slammed into us. Which sent me skidding and tumbling ass over teakettle along the top of the flying saucer because those aliens I’d been going for had suddenly ceased to exist.

  Damn. She’d hit the fuckers with the vaporize setting. And we’re not talking that trick she did from time to time where she teleported some
thing away and made it look like she was vaporizing them. No, that was straight up vaporization!

  She was playing for keeps.

  I slammed my hand down into the flying saucer and brought myself to a halt. I also left a giant tear in the top of the thing, but whatever. I wasn’t interested in preserving this thing if these assholes were taking on Natalie. No, it was going to get the can opener treatment and fuck the consequences!

  I stood up. Dusted myself off. I wanted to look at least somewhat presentable. I really wished I’d had time to stop by my apartment and freshen up.

  Assuming my apartment was still there, of course. If aliens had invaded and they were destroying stuff left and right then there was a good chance my apartment building and all my stuff was so much rubble adding to the whole post-apocalyptic ambience Starlight City was rocking these days.

  I looked up. And realized that something weird was going on. Everyone had stopped fighting. The villains who could fly were hovering in the middle of whatever fights they’d been in. Most of the alien shock troops in their armor had also stopped and were staring.

  Natalie was staring too. I smiled and walked towards her.

  “Hoo boy. I guess you didn’t see me in time to stop from pulling the trigger. It’s been awhile since you’ve shot me, but I can’t say…”

  She held her wrist blaster up. I stopped. Not because I was afraid her wrist blaster could do any damage so much as because that was odd behavior for her considering we were presumably being reunited after what looked to be one hell of a separation.

  She should be overjoyed to see that I was okay, but it’s not like I was surprised that real life wasn’t living up to my expectations.

  “Um, why are you pointing that thing at me?” I asked.

  “Because I’m sick and tired of you interrupting these fights,” she said. “I’ll tell you the same thing I told all the others. We’re not interested in your help. Now get out of here before…”

  I frowned. “Natalie. What are you talking about? It’s me! Selena! I woke up in some rubble…”

  “On the Starlight City campus, I know,” she said. “I’ve heard it all before. You woke up there and you have no idea how you got there and now you’re confused and all you want to do is help me. Or you remember me stealing your powers and all you want to do is kill me. Or you don’t remember anything about us but you want to help save the world. Well we don’t need your help after what you’ve done.”

  All the villains were still staring, and there was hostility there that couldn’t be explained by the simple hatred of a bunch of villains staring at someone who could potentially send them to the hoosegow.

  Assuming the hoosegow was even still there given the current state of the city. It was entirely possible that SuperMax was no more considering the number of villains who were out here fighting. It was almost enough to make me wonder whether or not these aliens were the good guys.

  That felt more likely than the convoluted set of circumstances that would lead a bunch of villains to suddenly start acting like heroes trying to save the day.

  “Come on Natalie,” I said. “You don’t have to do this. It’s me. Seriously. I don’t know what’s happened, but…”

  I tried floating forward. Apparently that was a bad idea. One moment I was floating, and the next I fell to the flying saucer. Only this time it was because of something she was firing at me.

  Something she had no business using. Something my Natalie would never use against me. A faint pink light washed over me and made me feel sick to my stomach. It was a feeling I recognized all too well, because it was something that’d happened to me at least once before.

  “What the hell are you doing?” I shouted. “You’re not Dr. Lana! You don’t use this kind of stuff on me!”

  “Oh, so you remember Dr. Lana?” Night Terror asked, because she was truly Night Terror in that moment. She was every inch the supervillain who’d brought Starlight City to its knees once upon a time. This wasn’t like my Natalie at all. I was looking at the villain who’d tried to kill me. I wasn’t looking at the woman I’d fallen in love with.

  I took a couple of steps forward. They were difficult steps considering I was under the ever present pink ray, but for a surprise it wasn’t hitting me as hard as it had, say, the last time I’d faced down Dr. Lana.

  No, I could still move. I didn’t need someone to come along and save my ass, and that was a good thing considering the person who’d saved my ass the last time around was now the person who was trying to kick my ass.

  I could do this. Anger coursed through me. The same anger I’d felt the last couple of times I’d gone up against someone who wasn’t reacting to me the way I’d been hoping for. That anger filled me, and before I knew it I was standing next to Natalie with my hand on her stupid wrist computer.

  Her mouth fell open in astonishment. I’m not sure what she expected, but this clearly wasn’t it.

  “What the hell are you?” she breathed.

  I shook my head. She seemed genuinely terrified of me. I wasn’t used to a world where my Natalie was genuinely terrified of me. I didn’t want to live in a world where my Natalie was genuinely terrified of me.

  I wanted things to be the way they were before. The two of us happy together. The two of us canoodling in one of the many levels of her lab pretending to watch a movie before we started making out.

  I stumbled again. This time I was hit with the vision of something happening in Natalie’s lab. I looked down at a strange rifle weapon and snapped it in two as Natalie stared at me with genuine terror. There was someone else there as well. Someone who called to me in a voice that was so persuasive. Like I wanted to do what she wanted to do. I wanted to kill Natalie because she wanted to kill Natalie.

  Something crunched. I blinked and shook my head. I stood in front of Natalie. Of course I was standing in front of Natalie. Isn’t that what I’d just been doing when I was…

  Somewhere. I couldn’t remember where. It was another one of those gaps in my memory. There for a moment, then gone.

  “You busted my wrist computer you bitch!”

  I looked down at the wrist computer still in my hand. The screen had little spiderwebs running across the whole thing. Like the front of a phone someone just dropped on concrete and there was no saving the thing which meant a trip to the phone store to listen to the assholes there talk about how unfortunate it was that you broke a phone that wasn’t paid off, but they’d be happy to get you onto another payment plan for a new phone in addition to the old payment plan.

  That made me even more angry than whatever had happened in that vision. I squeezed again, and Natalie cried out.

  “Stop it!” she shouted, and then she pulled back and did something she hadn’t done since the last time we were fighting. She punched me, and it was hard enough that it knocked me free even if it wasn’t hard enough to hurt.

  It wasn’t like there was much of anything that felt like it was going to hurt me. No, I felt a hell of a lot better now than I had in a good long while, physically speaking, even if I was confused as hell about the current state of the world.

  I skidded to a halt on the flying saucer and stared at Natalie. That anger spiked again.

  “What the fuck is your problem Natalie!”

  I didn’t get an answer. No, a bunch of figures in bright green started landing atop the flying saucer, and all of them were in masks that looked like they’d been raided from one of those party supply stores that keeps Halloween costumes in one part of the store year round.

  What the fuck was going on? What new craziness was this? Then the masked women, they were definitely women judging by the blonde hair streaming in the wind and the decidedly feminine figures, started attacking villains and aliens alike.

  Well then. I didn’t think it was possible for more hell to break loose, but Starlight City had proved me wrong once again.

  9

  Melee

  One of the masked blondes, dressed in what looked
like a green cheerleader outfit also obviously cribbed from the same Halloween store, came up to me and held her hand out.

  “Come with us if you want to live,” she said.

  I blinked a couple of times. “Did you seriously just quote Terminator at me?”

  I wasn’t even sure how I knew that line was from Terminator. I mean sure I knew Terminator was a movie. I knew it starred Arnold back when he was at the peak of his physical perfection. I knew it involved robots or something, and maybe time travel.

  That was all stuff that I’d picked up through cultural osmosis though. It was stuff that’d been out in the culture for so long that everyone knew it. I had no idea I could quote lines from the movie, and I was pretty sure that wasn’t something that’d ever come up in one of the viewing nights with Natalie where we were pretending to watch a movie while looking for every excuse to get hot and heavy.

  She’d said something about how watching those kinds of movies reminded her of an old friend she’d rather not think about. I was pretty sure that meant the computer we’d fought on our first real date, but I’d never pressed the issue.

  “I don’t know who you are,” I said. “But you need to stop attacking Natalie.”

  “Seriously?” the woman said, her voice muffled and sounding just a little weird because it was behind a plastic mask that looked like it came from some ‘80s cartoon-based costume. We’re talking one of those masks that had a little slit in the front for breathing. The thing that’s so much fun to stick your tongue in, but it doesn’t look anything like a real mask, and I was getting distracted in the middle of what was shaping up to be one hell of a fight between Natalie, these alien invaders, and these new women.

  “She doesn’t have your best interest at heart,” the girl said. “I don’t know what you remember about your time with her, but if you let her get close she’s going to steal your powers and leave you alone in the city with no way to defend yourself from traffickers and worse.”